Meaning of Life:
To dutifully please, respect, honor and obey women.
Five Things I Can't Live Without:
Duct tape, bubblegum, Velcro, Chuck Norris movies and my bedazzler.
What I Like To Do For Fun:
AC/DC, Motley Crue, Quiet Riot, Poison, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Def Leppard, and The Brady Six.
If I Could Be Anywhere Right Now:
On or near water.
I can remember important dates like birthdays and anniversaries;
I can listen;
I can keep a bed warm at night;
I can do as I'm told; and
I can open stuck jar lids with my bare hands.
For me the perfect date would entail picking my date up in my private stretch limousine, which would whisk us away to my awaiting personal jet while we enjoyed sipping expensive champaign. We would bring the champaign with us as we admired the view of the ocean outside the jets windows as it transported us to my villa in the tropics. Once to my villa we would freshen up before relaxing by the pool overlooking the private white sand beach leading to the crystal clear blue ocean waters. Once the Dolphins had finished their
spectacular display, and set out for the day, it would be back to the limo and out for a romantic dinner. Once at our exclusive reserved table we would enjoy appetizers while listening to the live band and viewing the brilliant color display as the sun slowly
set behind the horizon. We would savor our main course in the glow of tiki torches and the soothing sound of the ocean, lost in the company of each other. After dinner we'd delight in conversation, laughs and slow dances, our bodies pressed tightly against one another,
oblivious to all but each other and the passion swelling within us. As the band began to pack up we'd decide the not too distant quiet walk along the beach to be the prefered method home, with the full moon providing plentiful light to guide us. We'd take our time walking hand in hand, talking and laughing. We would stop intermittently to embrace and share a long, hard, deep, passionate kiss, exploring each others bodies with our hands, our hunger for each other becoming feverish. As time passes unnoticed the Villa would suddenly come into view. Without a word spoken we'd both breakout in a race towards its entrance doors. Being the gentleman I would allow my date to win by a hair. We'd share one last deep, passionate kiss on the doorstep, before retreating inside to activities that would occupy us to near sunrise.
Or since I don't really own a limo, private jet or villa the next option would be picking my date up in my mom's Pacer Station Wagon and heading down to the Fu King Chinese Buffet. After dinner we would peel rubber in the Pacer to my parent's house and I would
introduce her to my groovy pad in the basement. After setting the mood by popping the soundtrack from the original Rocky movie into the ole 8-track, we would share a night of endless laughter by taking turns messing with Truckers on the CB Radio.
Best Reason to Get to Know Me:
Because I'm a dork and dorks are cool.