Three nuns were talking. The first nun said, 'I was cleaning in Father's room the other day and do you know what I found? A bunch of pornographic magazines.' 'What did you do?' the other nuns asked. 'Well, of course I threw them in the trash.' The second nun said, 'Well, I can top that. I was in Father's room putting away the laundry and I found a bunch of condoms!' 'Oh my!' gasped the other nuns. 'What did you do?' they asked. 'I poked holes in all of them!' she replied. The third nun fainted.

On their first night together, a newlywed couple go to change. The new bride comes out of the bathroom showered and wearing a beautiful robe. The proud husband says, 'My dear, we are married now, you can open your robe.' The beautiful young woman opens her robe, and he is astonished.'Oh, oh, aaaahhh,' he exclaims, 'My God you are so beautiful, let me take your picture. Puzzled she asks, 'My picture?' He answers, 'Yes my dear, so I can carry your beauty next to my heart forever'. She smiles and he takes her picture, and then he heads into the bathroom to shower. He comes out wearing his robe and the new wife asks, 'Why do you wear a robe? We are married now.' At that the man opens his robe and she exclaims, 'oh, OH, OH MY, let me get a picture'. He beams and asks why and she answers, 'So I can get it enlarged!'

A woman posts an ad in the news paper that looks like this... 'Looking for man with these qualifications; won't beat me up; or run away from me and is great in bed.' She got lots of phone calls replying to her ad but met someone perfect at her door one day. The man she met said, 'Hi, I'm Bob. I have no arms so I won't beat you up and no legs so I won't run away.' So the lady says, 'What makes you think you are great in bed?' Bob replies, 'I rang the door bell didn't I?

Dirty Little Matt is sitting in the back of math class, obviously not paying any attention, when the teacher calls his name. 'Yeah teach?' he replies. 'If there are three ducks on a fence and you shoot one of them with a shotgun, how many are left?' asks the teacher. Matt answers 'Well, teach, if I shoot one of them with a shotgun, the loud noise is gonna make them all fly off.' 'No, Matt, there will be two left if you shoot one with a shotgun, but I like the way you're thinking.' the teacher responds. 'Well, teach, I've got a question for you... There are 3 women that come out of an ice-cream parlor, one is biting her ice-cream cone, one is licking it, and one is sucking on it. Which one is married?' The teacher, a little taken back by the question answers, 'Well, uh, gee Matt, I guess the one that's sucking on the ice cream.' Matt replies 'No teach, the one that has the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking!'

This couple were in bed getting busy when the girl places the guys hand onto her pussy. 'Put your finger in me...' she asks him. So he does without hesitation, as she starts moaning. 'Put two fingers in...', she says. So in goes another one. She's really starting to get worked up when she says, 'Put your whole hand in!'. The guy's like, 'Ok!'. So he has his entire hand in, when she says moaning aloud 'Put both your hands inside of me!!!'. So the guy puts both of his hands in! 'Now clap your hands...' commands the girl. 'I can't', says the guy. The girl looks at him and says 'See, I told you I had a tight pussy!'.

Awesome. Welcome to MFC.

hope your neck isn't too sore.

Hi, and welcome to MFC, hope you having a good day! Good luck

Welcome to MFC!