EvilBeavis
Status:
Profile Headline:
Hi! I'm Beavis and my Grandma use to tell me: What doesn't kill you makes you shit your pants
Last Login:
within 7 days
Last Updated:
About Me
Username:
EvilBeavis
Gender:
Male
Ethnicity:
Caucasian
City:
Mato Grosso
Country:
Brazil
Sexual Preference:
Straight
Marital Status:
Divorced
Occupation/Major:
I wanna be your dog
School:
Chaz Marootie State Penal Colony
Favorite Food:
Polynesian lung wart pot pie. Like the French say: Bone Ass Petite!
Pets:
Mandrake, a retired Elvis impersonator from Australia. He's a kangaroo
About Me:
Hello. I am Beavis, a member of the Kreen-Akrore tribe from Brazil. We are called by many names: 1-The Yunk, 2-Montezuma's Revenge, 3-Brangelina, and 4-The Protectors Of The Orinoco River, to name a few.. I am currently employed at a poop shovel factory in New Jersey. My boss, Julio, is a coelacanth and he is driven to become the wealthiest lungfish on earth. I haven't got the heart to tell him Elon Musk is also a coelacanth.
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25 Photos
LIFE SUCKS FOR BEAVIS
Interests & Hobbies
Meaning of Life:
Back there when I was in high school, the tribal council had a difficult time placing me for employment. Despite my diversified interests, each test I completed pointed to one thing, a career in the medical field. You can imagine how excited I was to receive this news and dreams of a high paying nursing or physician's career danced in my head! At my final counseling session, I was informed my scores indicated I was best suited for the job duties of a rectal thermometer.
Five Things I Can't Live Without:
1-Puds,
Favorite Books:
1-Spermagic: 1001 Fun Things You Can Do With Sperm by Beavis, 2-The Sperm Lover's Guide To Brazilian Prison Cuisine by Beavis, 3-How To Suck A Small Stinky Cock by Fellatio Poon Jr
What I Like To Do For Fun:
1-Spread my butt cheeks on a secluded beach in front of Donald Trump, Elon Musk, a couple of sadistic termites, and all their fat, sweaty, bilaterally symmetrical friends, 2-Boink sheep, 3-Seductively adjust my testicles and then smell my fingers, 4-I love poking other poorly hung men in the ass.
Favorite Songs:
I love classical music and my favorite album is: 1-The Buttcracker Suite by Tchaikovsky. Other favorites: 2-Sheep Lie by The Beastiality Boys (rated 5 stars by Farm And Rancher magazine), 3-Butt Rock Heaven by Kid Butt Rock
Favorite Movies:
1-The Sheriff Wore A Bra starring John Wayne, 2-Beavis Is A Fat Pile Of Shit (The Documentary) starring Beavis
Craziest Thing I've Ever Done:
I am the current world record holder, as listed by The Guinness Book of Records, in the category of Catholic Clergy Members Who Have Pulled My Finger. As of May 1, 2025, I have had 201 priests, 19 bishops, and 2 Popes pull my finger accompanied by my obligatory return fart.
If I Could Be Anywhere Right Now:
In the emergency room of a major hospital having something really big removed from my ass
Hobbies:
1-Cloacal respiration, 2- Delousing uncircumcised midgets
Talents:
1-I can lick my own balls. I can lick your balls too. If you want.
Perfect Mate:
My perfect mate would: 1-Have a gigantic flabby ass like Jennifer Buttpez, 2-Be Binomially flatulent, 3-And most importantly, she would not sing It's A Small World every time she sees my penis
Perfect Date:
A midnight walk thru the Rocky Gonad Mountains with a naked MILF and bitch farting every conservative talk show host we encounter
Turn Ons/Offs:
Turn On: 1-Large well-adjusted newts, 2-Pinata's filled with sperm. Turn Off: 1-Waiting for the diarrhea medication to take affect, 2-Famous Chinese midgets
Best Reason to Get to Know Me:
1-I am proud to announce that I, Beavis, am a licensed vocational asshole. 2-I look just like Brad Pitt. 3-Got milk? No. I bite ass for calcium, 4-I have a major split personality disorder. My bad personality is exemplified by my user account: Beavis, in which I have a small vocabulary and an even smaller dick and there are so many angry comments on this profile, I had to block access. My second personality is for user account: EvilBeavis. this is the nice sweet part of my personalities and
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Beavis
pedo