Interests & Hobbies
Favorite Books:
Happy The Penis Dry Humps A Really Old Moose by Mick Mars, The Big Book Of Celebrity Testicles by Madonna, The Shitty Things Hilary Clinton Has Done to Men by Bill Clinton
What I Like To Do For Fun:
Seize the day! Polka! Walk in the Black Forest. Octoberfest. Squirm.
Favorite Songs:
A long time ago when I was hitchhiking across Europa, I had a chance encounter with a Serbo-Croatian banjo player named Yaksnarf Bootyortuk. He was full of life and knew 10,000 songs by heart! A happy man with an eye patch, a peg leg, and liver spots on his hands and face, he was charming and handsome and knew how to treat a troubled young man with gender identity issues. I have fond memories of him singing my favorite German drinking and farting songs! we parted company in the summer of 1972 as I choose to attend a Rolling Stones concert in New York. I never saw him again but I have never forgotten him.
Hobbies:
Carousing, losing control, implying rude things about your mother
Perfect Mate:
A frauline with the big booty and titts that seem to dance on air when the polka comes on the radio.
Perfect Date:
Something low key, relaxed, and stress-free that does not leave the aftertaste of tuna in your mouth.
Turn Ons/Offs:
TURN OFF-Holding the bag, a woman whose nostrils flare when she laughs, ass happy neighbors, post-coital depression, blue cars, fingerhurts, passionately kissing a woman who has just barfed. TURN ON-a woman getting the hiccups while she gives me a blow job.
Best Reason to Get to Know Me:
YES! THIS ONE!