Yo dog I heard you prefer fucking Thai ladies rather than hanging out with us? Hope the golden triangle Id treating you well and you're not being sex traffic-ed. Love cooter
To my fondest Heathcliff,
My body aches for your sweet embrace.
Each day we are apart tears at my soul like the ravening claws of Satan himself.
My crevices moisten at the mere mention of your name.
Yours eternally,
Kebabs